Marriage counseling at Take Charge, Inc. in Overland Park, Kansas is available when your parent or your spouse’s parent has died. Whether their death was sudden or expected, hearing the news or being there with your mom or dad in their final moments is a shock to your system. Life will no longer be the same without them. Changes abound no matter if you lived with them, saw them or spoke to them daily, or had less frequent contact.
Your parent or spouse’s parent is irreplaceable, no matter if they were your parent by birth, by adoption, or by circumstances. Whether you were on the best of terms or if you were experiencing challenges in your relationship, their death shakes up your family structure and profoundly effects your perception of yourself as a member of the family. Perhaps a great deal of your role identity and/or your daily schedule involved caring for your parent; all that changed with their death. No matter what your age, or how long you have been independent of them, you may find yourself longing to be someone’s little girl/little boy again. Or you catch yourself thinking, “No one will ever love me or take care of me like my parent did.”
Helpful actions for after the death of a parent or your spouse’s parent include:
· Let your siblings, friends, and family members know how you are feeling; be available to give and receive support from each other
· Invite and deepen conversations about the memories you have of your parent
· Set up a memorial space in your home; place flowers or candles, a picture of your parent, a place to write messages or thoughts
· Give yourself plenty of time to grieve and process your feelings with other including in therapy
· Take good care of yourself and know that your heart is healing in baby steps
Marriage counseling with Terri Dichiser provides an atmosphere for couples to connect to one another, engage in pivotal conversation; listen to each other’s needs plus articulate your own needs to your partner while drawing them closer, all in clear simple conversation where parties feel in control about their deepest needs to feel connected and secure in the relationship, especially after the death of a parent.
There are also helpful things to do for your spouse when their parent dies. They include: listening to your spouse without interrupting, being prepared for emotional ‘whiplash’, practicing your own self-care, bringing small comforts to your spouse, and allowing growth from them.
Terri utilizes Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) to help couples reconnect with one another. She uses therapy and marriage counseling to help couples recognize the patterns they have established in their relationship and offers tools and strategies to break those patterns to create a renewed sense of safety and security with your spouse, especially after the death of your parent or theirs.
For more information about marriage counseling, call Take Charge, Inc. at (913)239-8255.